In Memorium

Satire1 again suspends its wit this post in honor of those individuals and their families whose sacrifice makes this and other blogs like it possible.

Don Arrup
Satire1

Dinosaurs Join Global Warming Debates

After Dr. David Wilkerson of John Moore University in Liverpool, UK proposed that the flatulence of the large herbivore dinosaurs produced the same greenhouse gas effects of our cows and cars a light hearted debate has been waged on the airwaves. Satire1 seeking as always to provide a more balanced and fair view of the controversy has decided to interview those who were there for the first climatic disaster. 

Godzilla

"Nobody with any real teeth could stand to be around those stinking vegetarians. Bunch of hulking green lugs chewing the cud all day and laughing at each other's thunderclap farts. I don't know if they raised the heat on the globe but you couldn't walk through their brown clouds and anything that did tasted like shit afterwards."

King Kong

"They'd burn the fur off your back if they blasted near you. Never be behind one. It was the only critter that I feared. Especially when the new grasses came in."

Barney (of Barney and Friends)

"They are the reason to this day why I beat children into a puddle if they rip on my set. They made the world unlivable before but not this time. If human children were as big as my cousins there wouldn't be a cell alive on this planet."

Dino (pet survivor of Flintstones)

"We were only eating what we were told was good for us. Ate our greens everyday, became social pariahs and still became extinct. It's like kids and broccoli today." 

Jurassic Jack

"Obviously your politicians evolved from the brontosaurus (literally thunder lizard). And now with all the super pacs and giant campaign coffers it's going to smell just like the bad old days."

Don Arrup

Satire1

Is Everybody Happy?

I do not know a single liberal who considers President Barack Obama a liberal.

I do not know a single conservative who thinks Former Governor Mitt Romney is a conservative.

I do not know a single independent who thinks that either is independent of party loyalty, special interests, big donors, lobbyists and a blind love of themselves.

Is anybody happy?

Don Arrup

Satire1