Chaos.gov

Satire1 gained access to the God Help Me office of the Affordable Care Act Initiative Strike Force to find out what questions citizens were asking regarding their new health care choices. We spoke to Faceless Bureaucrat who runs the secret unit of economists, communists and insurance experts who some suspect understand the system.

S1

What was the most frequently asked questions from those who called or logged into your website?

FB

Can I keep my current health insurance.

S1

And will they?

FB

Get real.

S1

Besides debunking that fantasy what was the most frequently asked question by men?

FB

Will my new policy still pay for my Viagra.

S1

And will most policies still cover that fun saving drug?

FB

All policies will cover Viagra which now will be the primary therapy for impotence, incontinence, high blood pressure, heart disease, prostate cancer and depression to name a few. 

S1

What do women ask?

FB

They wanted to know if their health plans would finally stop giving their husbands Viagra.

S1

What were the concerns of parents?

FB

Would their plan cover elective surgery to remove their kids from their backs.

S1

For ObamaCare to work large numbers of young adults have to sign up. Has that been happening?

FB

Only the young hypochondriacs and the ones with previous conditions.

S1

Do you believe that a majority of younger adults will enroll?

FB

Yes, but by the time we get this system working they won't be young anymore. 

Don Arrup

Satire1