Bitter Pill

In San Francisco Democratic Presidential nominee Senator Barack Obama said that many working class voters were angry and bitter over economic conditions and have squandered their votes on religious, gun and immigration issues. The Clinton and McCain camps and small town citizens were quick to respond.

“He’s accusing working class and small town Americans of having feelings.” Said Bishop Mobely of the Clinton Camp. “Just because they didn’t go to Harvard doesn’t mean they’re children. It was a very condescending and elitist remark. These hard working Americans hate immigrants, love guns and use God to isolate themselves and condemn others because that’s the American way.”

“Sure things are tough right now for us here in the sticks,” said Clayton Heeb of Bentwig, Pennsylvania. “Our jobs moved overseas, our homes were foreclosed on and illegal immigrants took what few service jobs and affordable shacks were left but we don’t let it get us down or angry. We just buy more ammo.”

“This guy Obama is out of touch,” said John Deersly, an independent. “There will always be problems to solve and sacrifices to be made but its not like we don’t have a wife to beat.”

“I believe in Jesus in good times and bad,” said Betty Jo Bob Jean of Somewhere, Kansas. “This Iraq Obomber fellow dressed too funny when he was a child to understand how we feel. I think he’s one of those intellectuals, the same people who got Jesus in trouble and were nowhere to be found when he got crucified. How Jesus got mixed up with Jews is a great mystery but I think he did it to warn us against education.”

“I’ve seen nothing but smiling faces at our rallies all over this country,” said Ellen Nest of the McCain camp. “John tells them all about our progress in Iraq where we are disarming the populace; breaking up militias and criminal gangs; rebuilding the infrastructure; securing the borders; ending paralyzing partisanship; creating good jobs and how someday we will have the chance to do the same here in America.”

Don Arrup
Satire1