Rumors, riots, demonstrations and spontaneous marches took place across the nation as the American public turned on their television sets Thursday night and President Obama was not lecturing the nation on the need to be calm.
“He wasn’t on Today or Oprah or whoever does the Tonight Show. Where is Obama? Do we still have a President?”
“They couldn’t have impeached him since yesterday. I thought it must be a conspiracy.”
“Obama’s been turning grey so quickly I thought maybe Michelle made him quit.”
“I think he made himself sick trying to push Health Care reform through.”
As Obama’s absence from the airways continued into Friday afternoon panic began to grip the nation. Commentators offered little solace with half hearted speculations that President Obama might be holed up in the Oval Office actually executing his duties as chief executive officer of the United States.
“I didn’t vote for him to be doing that same old crap. I voted for him to be on TV telling the country every night that The Man for once isn’t a white guy.”
“Maybe he’s on vacation. Does he have a ranch like the last one?”
“At least when he was overseas we knew where he was. Like that African country that fights Star Trek.”
“I never knew what he was talking about but I knew he was talking to me.”
Don Arrup
Satire1
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